Guys know that a good relationship requires having a few convos that aren’t totally fun or always interesting to them. They should be able to handle that, and if not, they’re not worth the time. But certain topics are just straight torturous to them, seriously. They’d rather run into traffic. So if you’d like a long, harmonious existence with your guy, consider sparing him from the following.
- “Why won’t you tell me what’s wrong?”
Obviously you want to help, but this gets old to him fast. If you don’t know by now, verbalizing comes less naturally to men than women, so asking them to spill after they’ve already resisted just adds more stress to an already-bad day. A better idea: Say “I’m totally here if there’s anything I can do,” and change the topic. It’s sweet and shows you’re not taking it personally that they are not ready to talk.
2. “So he’s like ‘Huh?’ And she’s all ‘Whatever!‘”
First of all, nonstop gossip makes you sound like you should be cast on Laguna Beach or Real Housewives. And since these topics aren’t about interacting with your guy, he’s forced to head nod while you go off, which isn’t fun for him. It also makes him worry that he will become the target of your gossip. Do him this favor: skip the work and girlie gossip, and only tell him stories that relate to you.
3. “How many women have you slept with?“
Ugh – there’s never a right answer to this question. If he’s slept with more people than you, you’ll freak out. If you’ve slept with more than him, you’ll feel guilty and judged. There’s no winning. A safer way to get insight into his sexual appetite is by asking something like “What’s a bedroom fantasy you’ve always had but never tried?” You will learn something useful – like what gets him going – but won’t be locked in to fulfilling his wildest desires if they’re not your speed.
4. “Well, do you remember what tomorrow is?“
This kind of pop quiz sends guys into panic mode. If they hear that, they assume they have forgotten something big, like an important job interview you have and they’ll be in big trouble. So just give your guy a direct reminder like “I’m so excited but nervous to be meeting with this firm finally.” Clue him in and he may even get up early to brew you some motivational coffee.
